I’ll Eat Later If That’s Cool

He doesn't know what to do with them all

Yeah, it’s a stupid idea to let one small thing stop you moving.

For me, it’s feeding the dog. I’ll hold my bladder, afraid to walk past my sister’s door, because if the dog wakes he’ll follow me, waiting for food — and all I wanted was a shit and a moment to think about how I’ll get through the day. Stupid excuse.

Same with toast. One slice satisfies; two make me guilty. I always over-indulge, then regret it.

Just like a threesome. At first it feels like more must be better. But soon you realise one hand doesn’t know what the other’s doing, you’re exhausted, and you think: yeah, this is way too much work.